music and poetry for sensitive birds

Hello,

I'm Conner Carey (they/them), a poet and songwriter with a background in content marketing. Welcome to my tiny internet home.

My Background

I was a child of Britney Spears and NSYNC. I watched music videos on VH1 before every day of middle school. As a teenager, I stoked the fires of my eating disorder on Tumblr and taught myself HTML and CSS to code sick layouts for MySpace.

I grew up middle class; you know, when America had one. I was 15 when my mom chose freedom over security, and my parents divorced.

After that, Mom and I lived below the poverty line. It was a major wake-up call to the litany of advantages I had been able to take for granted.

Meanwhile, I dreamed of stardom in Los Angeles or New York. My mom even took money from her savings so I could attend a 4-week acting program at New York Film Academy in LA. It was life-changing in the best way.

But I was scared. Scared I was too fat to succeed. Scared I would always struggle to make ends meet. Scared the big city would swallow me whole.

I lived on the inside of myself, so nothing outside could hurt me. But it meant that no one really saw me because I didn't let them. I felt the most myself when I pretended to be a Broadway star in my room late at night.

One night, I found an answer I didn't know I was looking for. From a Facebook ad, I discovered a hippie college in middle-of-nowhere Iowa. "Conscious-based education. Vegetarian meals. One course a month." Yes, please.

By the end of summer 2010, Mom and I visited the small town. I met other potential students who were weirdos like me. I got accepted into the university and away we went...somewhere over our rainbow.

2011

I unfurled. I found myself. I smoked weed for the first time. I fell in love and got my heart thoroughly broken. I performed. I became known as a performer. In a small town of 10,000, I felt famous.

Then I got sick. I was committed to the hospital...a story for another day. I nearly lost my life, and it forced me to let go of hating my body.

I entered an era of self-love and self-dedication. I wrote hundreds of poems and a musical, The End of the World.

2016

In 2018, Mom and I moved into a 24' RV to travel the country. We went on our biggest adventure yet. A year later... somewhere in Oregon, I met my partner, Callista. And so the story continues to be written.

Currently, I am pursuing a part-time degree through Berklee College of Music, studying Songwriting & Music Production with the goal of writing, composing, and producing my music.

I have always written songs. I am so excited to share them. Thank you for reading; I'd love to hear about you.

Thank You for Being

May you find something that inspires, delights, or provides room for a cleansing breath. Thank you for continuing to be inside your body. I know it's not always easy, but I thank you for your commitment to being alive.

To the kick-ass creatives full of integrity and heart, stay the course darlings. We're just getting started.

With love,

Conner

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